WORD:
Can we start by acknowledging the irony of me writing this? I’ve been putting it off for weeks. I’m deleting everything I write by the paragraph. I feel completely uninspired to write anything meaningful. With the exception of maybe my fiancé, mom and dad, I’m not sure anyone wants to read this.
I used to love writing. Then I bought into the lie that nobody cared what I wrote -that nothing I wrote had any value. So I stopped.
Why did I agree to write this? The invitation felt as if somebody believed in me.
But as I sat down to write it, every idea that popped in my head felt cliché and the hope that someone believed my writing was meaningful crumbled immediately.
All the ideas I had seemed insignificant. I felt insignificant.
But then it occurred to me – God often has something to say to these hypercritical statements I make about myself. While sometimes difficult to believe, at my core, I know Christ whispers to me that I have immense value - each of us has immense value. Not because of any major stamp we’ll make in history – in 100 years, we’ll all likely be forgotten. Instead, we hold such value because the Lord has declared it so. Though one of countless humans created by the Creator, we were made with intentionality, purpose and value.
I’m not the only thing I have decided is lacking significance. There’s a lot I have deemed insignificant over the years. Currently, I have decided my new job fits into this category. There have been countless days as I wash the dishes, pick up toys left behind by the children, wash, fold, and put away laundry, sweep floors, and toil over what in the world I’m going to make them for dinner, that I wonder what purpose this possibly holds. Yes, it is helpful, but it could not possibly hold any lasting value. What good am I doing for the kingdom of God as I’m changing yet another load of laundry?
My old job was in a ministry I truly adored. I had the privilege of being part of an organization that I completely bought into – their philosophy was incredible, my coworkers were some of the most wonderful humans I’ll ever meet, and I absolutely fell in love with the kids I worked with. It was clear I had been granted the immense privilege to join with Christ in a sliver of the wonderful work he continues to do in Boys Ranch, Texas. What I did had purpose. I could feel it in the very depths of my soul.
Back to my current job as a nanny, my days were no longer centered on prayer meetings and hours spent building relationships. In place of prayer, I have household chores. In place of building deep, Christ-centered relationships, I spend hours alone in an empty house. Despite trying to fight these feelings, what I do began to feel very insignificant. I couldn’t help but wonder - in every dish I washed, every shirt I folded, every menial chore - where is the lasting value?
Months into my nannying job, I still ask this question often, but I’m beginning to question if these redundant, insignificant moments are actually far more significant than I could ever imagine. What if this less-than-glamorous piece of my story is more than simply a refining season?
What if these insignificant times are about encountering a significant God? The God who commands the seas is not only with us in the significant times in our lives, but Christ, Emmanuel, is with us in even the most insignificant moments. The Lord looks at these moments that I continually declare meaningless, a waste of time, and he deems them worthy. He is with us not only in our most joyous moments or only in those of deepest despair – he is with us in the most mundane, seemingly inconsequential moments. And if nothing else breathes life and beauty into these moments, the presence of a holy God suddenly makes the most insignificant moments sacred.
I pray Christ would give me the grace to see past the meaningless so that my eyes would be opened to the Holy of Holies around me.
MEAL:
Lemon garlic chicken zoodles: delicious, health conscious, AND easy to make – the perfect meal! http://www.mastercook.com/app/recipe/WebRecipeDetails?recipeId=5859097
MUSIC:
“Flood Waters” by Josh Garrels – this song speaks to the massive, unimaginable love of our Lord, that is the essence of his ever-present nature.
PRAYER:
When you find yourself in the midst of an insignificant moment, pray these words to shed light on God's presence around you:
Where are you, Lord?
In this moment here, in this moment of insignificance, give me eyes to see where you are in the midst of it.
Reveal more of your beauty breathed into this very moment.
And give me the grace to rest in this beauty, that the Lord almighty is ever-present in the most insignificant of times.
TIME:
What aspects of your life have you deemed insignificant? How can you leave room for God in those moments? And as you recognize the Lord’s presence with you in this insignificance, how does Christ transform it from insignificant to beautiful?